Wed
25 Nov
Categories: Speculoos

Hello. My name is Stuart and I’m an addict…

For a while now I’ve been trying to keep my problem a secret from everyone I know and love. I guess the reality is that I was trying to avoid acknowledging that I even ‘had’ a problem. As if hiding my addiction from the outside world meant the addiction itself didn’t really exist.

However, things have gotten worse recently and I am unable to control my addiction any longer. I feel the uncontrollable cravings getting stronger all of the time. I need it. I can’t function without it anymore. It is time to admit that I am hopelessly addicted to Speculoos sandwich spread.

I can’t help myself. I have only just discovered the stuff but it is so delicious. If it was not for Holland’s tolerance of certain addictive substances I’m sure Speculoos sandwich spread would already have been classified as a class A drug and made illegal. It’s the only way to explain my uncontrollable need to frantically lick the jar and my fingers clean whenever my supply has almost run out.

I’ve tried to get myself clean but there is no hope of me achieving this impossible goal. Every time I walk past the breakfast goods section in the Albert Heijn the Speculoos calls out to me. Before I know it I am rushing to the checkout with an arm load of jars which I take home and hide around the house in case there is a sudden intervention.

Speculoos sandwich spread actually comes from Speculaas cookies which are traditionally available during Sinterklaas (but are now available all year round). The cookies themselves are also very addictive but when they are crushed down in to their purist crumb form and (through a special process) turned into sandwich spread they become a hundred times more addictive. The cookies are just a gateway snack to the truly addictive sandwich spread. I honestly cannot convey to you how addicted I am to the stuff.

My addiction is so bad that I even tried to make Speculoos sandwichs between two Speculaas cookies instead of bread. I nearly ODed but it was worth it.

I don’t usually indorse destructive or damaging behavior but if you can find a Speculoos sandwich spread provider you should try some. It’s worth the uncontrollable addiction to its amazing taste.

Comments:

34 Responses to “Addiction”

  1. Marie-Claude says:

    I started reading your blog recently and never commented. But this time, I just have to comment: I am an addict too. This stuff is just WAY too delicious, it should be forbidden. And they now have a ‘crunchy’ version too!!!! ARRRGGGHHH!!!!!

  2. Invader Stu says:

    Marie-Claude – Crunchy version? that’s it. My life as I know it is over. Thanks for you comment :)

  3. Lizzy says:

    Oh my God, I can’t contain myself around Speculoos spread either. I actually started eating it straight from the jar with a spoon the last time I bought some. I saw an add for the crunchy kind recently, but it hasn’t shown up in any of my neighborhood grocery stores yet. Where is it? I need it lol. By the way, have you gotten addicted to chocolate covered kruidnoten yet? We tried the Bolletje “truffle” kind yesterday and we already ate the whole bag. Send help!

  4. Melissa P says:

    How are you going to be able to do stand up, when your mouth will be full of speculoos and cookies?

  5. Invader Stu says:

    Lizzy – I’ll admit that I have also eaten just the spread by itself. And my girlfriend brought chocolate covered kruidnoten home the other night… let’s just say I eat so much that I made myself sick that night.

    Melissa P – I have no idea. My mouth will most likly be glued shut with the stuff and I’ll be forced to mime.

  6. Alison says:

    I’ve been eating the speculaas loaf filled with almond butter quite a bit this season, but I didn’t know about the speculoos spread. Oh dear. Must avoid that aisle.

  7. Invader Stu says:

    Alison – No, give into the temptation that is speculoos spread. Join us.

  8. Dykam says:

    Speculoos… speculaas does taste better.

    Hmm, I buy my stuff at the Albert Heijn… you spelled it wrong :D.

  9. Anneke says:

    Ugh, you actually LIKE speculoos? *insert sounds of utter disbelief* I really hate the stuff, I think it’s gross. Hmm maybe I should be someones sponsor? Or can only recovered addicts be sponsors?

  10. zed says:

    It’s way too sweet for me – I consider myself sweet enough already.

  11. Anita says:

    I will read the label with the list of ingredients on this thing. Seems to be something very processed. I better never start with it. Probably there are zillions of calories. Gross !

  12. Invader Stu says:

    I never seen one of my post polarize my readers so much between who likes something and who does not. Hehe

    Dykam – Thanks for letting me. I’m going to fix that.

    Anneke – Either way I’ll invite you to the intervention if you like.

    Zed – You got that right.

    Anita – Sometimes it’s just better not to know.

  13. Wezz6400 says:

    Speculoos? Sandwitch spread? Ugh, kids these days…

    While you were wasting your life eating nothing but crap on your sandwitch we’ve enjoying the great taste of speculaas and bread the way it’s supposed to be: sweetness which crushes your teeth, if they haven’t been knocked out by the crunchyness of a wrecking ball. The recepy is quite simpel: take two slices of bread, butter them, put two speculaas cookies on one, put the other slice on top, cut in half, and munch! If you’re up to it that is… Speculoos, mumble mumble the good old days mumble mumble.

  14. Invader Stu says:

    Wezz6400 – Yeah, yeah granddad :p

    I guess in the interest of cultural relations I do have to give it a try :p

  15. suus says:

    speculoos? Never heard of it. I know the cookies. I am going to try it, because I am a dare devil who just tries everything repulsive and lethal.

  16. suus says:

    Btw, Stu. I followed your blog in the old days, then you quit. And after the Universal Sigh of Disbelief you’ve obviously gotten back to your senses and your blogging. Great to see you back. :)

  17. Invader Stu says:

    susuus – That’s the spirit :)

    Thanks for coming back. You’re right, I did come to my senses :)

    anna – Yes it is. It’s made by the Speculoos fairies in Speculoos land were it grows on the magic speculoos tree. *puts fingers in ears* La la la la la.

    (but I know what you mean)

  18. Gez says:

    MMMMMMMmmmmmm…

    Spe-cu-loos…

    *Eyes stare vacantly, tongue lols, saliva dribbles….*

  19. Invader Stu says:

    Gez – That’s the affect it has on me too

  20. VallyP says:

    LOL, what extreme reactions here, Stu! I so enjoyed this post. I know so what you mean by the addiction! I don’t dare buy it anymore because I lso eat it straight from the jar if it’s on board, but I’ve never tried the biccie sarmies! Awesome!!! Must try those for sure…even if it’s only for Christmas…then I’ll have to give up again. BTW I’m also kind of addicted to Peanut butter too, so i’m guessing you are too…speculoos spread is like the conoisseurs nutty butter, no?

  21. Invader_Stu says:

    I’m sorry to disappoint you VallyP. I can’t stand Peanut butter (or Pindakass as it’s known by its street name). I’ve tried it once or twice but I can’t handle it. So I’m always very careful that I’m not getting the Speculoos and Pindakaas mixed up.

  22. Nienke says:

    Hi, I just found your blog while SOGging (Studie Ontwijkend Gedrag) and I have to give some additional info here, as I’m a annoying and traumatised purist.
    Speculoos is different from speculaas. My boyfriend is from Belgium and I’m Dutch, and we’ve found the cookies tasted different in the two countries. So we did some research and we discovered that speculaas contains certain spices, while speculoos contains caramel. Speculoos comes from Belgium, while speculaas is everywhere over the Netherlands. While Lotus Speculoos now has started to invade the kikkerland, it is impossible for me to find some decent speculaas in Belgium. Boohoo.
    Maybe you could also try Bastogne koeken, as they’re also made by adding caramel? Or Bastogne koeken with almond, extremely addictive!

  23. Invader Stu says:

    Nienke – I was actully getting a bot mixed up about the whole speculaas and Speculoos thing so it is good to have it cleared up. I don’t know if I should go any where near Bastogne koeken though, I’ll be come even more of a hopeless addict.

  24. Dragonlady says:

    I’m afraid you will have to bring some with you when you come over Stuart, I don’t want you going cold turkey on us. All we can offer is peanut butter (crunchy or smooth), chocolate spread, some really nice caramel spread from Brittany and really British Rum butter and Brandy butter.

  25. Invader Stu says:

    That’s not a bad idea. I’ll have to bring some with us so you can try it.

  26. The girlfriend says:

    ofcourse we will :D Let’s invade Brittian with this….

  27. Invader Stu says:

    How did I go from from invading Holland to invading my own homeland? You did this to me woman! *points finger at ‘the’ girlfriend*

  28. Jennifer de Jong says:

    OMG!!!! I have to try this! I love Seepklatjes!!!! Can’t imagine it in a spread…. :) WOW

  29. Invader Stu says:

    You will be amazed. the stuff is so good.

  30. […] Or maybe not.), and break old habits.  Oh yeah, and I’m really looking forward to trying Speculoos! Leave a Comment Leave a Comment so far Leave a comment RSS feed for comments on this post. […]

  31. […] My friend wasn’t far from the truth because when I opened my box, the first thing I spotted was a Spéculoos bar of chocolate from NewTree. I first came across the NewTree brand at a chocolate festival I went to in Brugge, last year, and loved them – especially the chili bar. And Spéculoos flavour…yum (Invader Stu can tell you a bit about that). […]

  32. […] the Nether­lands with hilar­i­ous anec­dotes about hav­ing your bike stolen, an addic­tion to Specu­loos and signs to look out for that you might be becom­ing […]

  33. BilgeRat says:

    migawd. I thought that Nutella was the most dangerous, addictive substance known to food science. Now you tell me about this; I’m sunk, truly sunk… My only hope may be that it just isn’t available in the Midwest of The States…

    Oh good lord…
    http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_ss_fb_0_9?url=search-alias%3Dgrocery&field-keywords=speculoos&sprefix=speculoos%2Celectronics%2C240

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