Today I did the manly-est thing ever known!
No one has ever come close to being as manly as I have upon this day in the entire history of world. Early cave men who sat around their newly discovered ‘fire’ while eating raw meat from the bones of their prey used to tell each other stories about the day they might be even half as manly as this. Throughout the whole of history great men have tried to make their name known through great deeds to reach this level of manly-ness. However, all of their amazing achievements pale in comparison to the epic story I am about to tell you. It is a story that will be told for years to come. It is a story that men will tell other men down pub before they look bitterly into their pint glasses and realize how empty their lives are. It is the kind of story that will make women swoon, men cry and inspire the children of tomorrow for generations to come. There will be statues made, songs sung and films filmed. It is a story that will be remembered forever!
Today I returned a faulty item to the DIY store and put some shelves up for my wife!