Dreadfully Dutch Fake Facts – Part 4

1) The Netherlands sometimes goes by the name Holland for tax reasons.

2) Holland is not below sea level. The sea is above Holland level.

3) The word ‘gezellig’ was successfully translated into English in 1982 but the Dutch government covered it up.

4) Everyone in Holland wears clogs. The sound of thousands of people walking in wooden shoes on the city’s concrete streets is deafening.

5) Tulips have become intelligent and are slowly taking over the country one field at a time.

6) Everyone in Holland lives in a windmill… apart from those who don’t… who aren’t really Dutch.

7) The Dutch consider hills to be as mythical as unicorns and fairies. They laugh at anyone with such geological beliefs.

8) None of the cannabis in Amsterdam is real. Tourists are getting stoned by the placebo effect.

9) If you drain all the canals of Amsterdam you will find the remains of an ancient lost city (and a lot of bikes) underneath.

10) The reclaiming of land from the sea is mainly down to the Dutch being very OCD.

11) Dutch drop was first invented as a way of uncovering German spies during World War II. It was the uncontrollable facial expressions of shock and horror upon experiencing the extreme salty taste that identified them as not being Dutch.

12) Raw herring was first served in Holland due to a miss translation in a cookbook. Since then it has become hugely popular throughout the entire country. No one has had the heart to point out the mistake to the Dutch.

Want to read some fake facts about the English? Check out the list of Awfully British Fake Facts.


28 responses to “Dreadfully Dutch Fake Facts – Part 4”

  1. Niclas says:

    I can imagine all of the above to be true! :)

  2. Antoine says:

    This reminds me of the time I attended a Computer Security talk in the Netherlands. The Dutch were very happy to be hosting the event and during the welcome speech, we were treated to two things that the Dutch like (and I quote)

    “We really like Orange. And we like going Dutch”

    And she said this with nary a smile ….

  3. Alison says:

    Love the bit about drop! We’ve had friends sneak some to us in various forms and there truly is no way to control your face when that taste suddenly hits!

  4. AQK1982 says:

    Really, how do you come up with this stuff?

    Have you been huffing Speculoos again :-)?

  5. dragon lady says:

    Dutch Drop is on our “to try” list next time we come over.

  6. Next time I come over, I definitely have to try drop…just to see how terrible it is. :P

    (And I really hope my friend wasn’t acting silly due to a placebo!)

  7. Svardskampe says:

    Don’t take minty drop or salmiak if it’s the first drop you try, those are the strongest.

    But we have better foods for you tourists to try, every international guest I give a pack of mini stroopwafels, and they get completely addicted to it and take loads of it home with them.

    • Invader_Stu says:

      I am addicted to stroopwafels :D They are sooooo good. But yeah, I am staying away from all kinds of drop.

    • Sarah C. says:

      My dad has actually threatened to not pick me up at the airport when I visit if I don’t have a minimum amount of gift stroopwafels for him in my suitcase.

      It’s a sickness. I haven’t dared to introduce my parents to speculoos. (He liked drop. Really. I don’t get it.)

  8. Meta says:

    We have always heard that in WWII the Dutch just asked the Germans to say “Scheveningen” :-)

  9. Stefan says:

    American movies have so much wrong about the Dutch, Holland, The Netherlands. Every time a person is from Holland, or for example, a dog trained in Holland, the Americans start to talk German! German is the language in Germany, not from our proud Dutch folks. In the 16th century The Netherlands was the richest country in the world. We founded New Amsterdam (New York) and nowadays we are remembered by our wooden shoes, tullips, windmills and everybody in the Netherlands smokes weed :P

    I think it’s funny and i can put it all a side, but you guys really need to know the real Dutch and the real Dutch people. Dutch people are quite stubborn, but that makes us a great addition to the world i think. We are open mined about very culture and try to treat everyone with respect. At least, the most of our citizens.

    • Invader Stu says:

      I’ll never forget watching Austin Powers Goldmember in the cinema and the amount of Dutch people that started shouting at the screen.

  10. Bert says:

    Ik vinden day heel leuk. Dropjes? Een heel mind vol.

  11. Likeahike says:

    Facial expression with a mouthful of drop? Pure enjoyment! I’m not sure I make the Dutch average of four pounds a year (although when you exclude babies and people who never eat drop, that average goes up quite a bit), but I try to do my part.

  12. Best Blog Posts of the Week: Adventure at Home and Abroad - Notes of Nomads says:

    […] Some More Lies About the Dutch by Invading […]

  13. Annette says:

    I found my colleague (Geography teacher) reading your website at school and when asked he said he was intending to use this post for his next class, which deals with stereotypes and he said that this was very useful for that, because it will show the kids how people who are not from Holland might think about that. I think you should be rightly proud :)

  14. No 11 is the best! I am Dutch, I live in delft. I love your site☺

Tags: , , ,
%d bloggers like this: