Drunken Train Fiasco


Post Drunk Check List:

Hangover: Unfortunately
Bones: Intact
Location: Home, thank god
Dignity: Warning! Major damage to the load bearing structures!

I’ve been less accident prone lately. In general this is a good thing for me but it also means I have less silly accident prone stories to write about. I was probably tempting fate when I stated this to a co-worker on Friday night during a company outing to a local pub. We were all quite drunk and I’d already been asked to re-tell the broken ankle story again twice. I should have realized that was another sign that something would happen.

However, everything was fine while I was at the pub (even though I drank more then I intended to). There were no problems during my stumble to the station and the train departed with out incident. Unfortunately I was not on it because I was on a different train bound for another destination. This only dawned on my drunk brain when I realized the train journey was taking longer then normal. My suspicion was confirmed when I slurred out a question to a fellow passenger.

At the time I thought I must have been on the fast train to Hilversum. I know people in Hilversum so (although it would have been embarrassing) I could have gone over to their place if there were no more trains running. Unfortunately Hilversum came and went with out a stop. My train station of salvation passed by in a blur of speed and I realized I had no idea where I was going. Another slurred question and I was informed that the train was going to Utrecht. Utrecht is quite far from where I live which is why I then proceeded to pace up and down and look quite worried.

When I arrived at Utrecht it was obvious that I would not be getting home via a train. There were no more until five in the morning. The station was deserted apart from another worried looking individual who seemed to be in the same situation. The only place that was open was the nearby Burger King.

For a little while I stumbled around the station wondering what to do next. Given my past track record I did not want to temped fate any more by trying to find an alternative method of getting home and sleeping in a 24 hour fast food restaurant was not an experience I wanted to repeat. So I did the only other thing I could do. I phoned my flat mate and asked him to pick me up in his car. I felt like an drunk idiot teenager who had just been forced to call his dad to bail him out of a tricky situation. Luckily he did not mind helping me out. The only damage done was to my dignity but it did make me wonder what might have happened if my flat mate did not have a car.

In the future I’ll be paying much more attention to train signs.

12 responses to “Drunken Train Fiasco”

  1. Mick Gordon says:

    Not so bad – there was no huge loss of dignity. I recall waking up in a gutter in downtown Gibraltar, first thing I saw was a greasy old chip paper blowing around in front of my nose, I was looking at this for a few moments not realizing I was lying in the gutter until one of the Moroccan street sweepers prodded me with a broom to see if I was alive. Not such a proud story but I am faceless here and that was around 20 years ago.

  2. marycub says:

    Maybe you should just steer clear of train stations altogether since they seem to cause you so much trouble!

  3. ChickyBabe says:

    They let you sleep in a 24h restaurant? Did you have fries with that? :P

  4. Invader_Stu says:

    Mick Gordon – You win :p

    Marycub – I’ll add it to my list along with lifts

  5. BlondebutBright says:

    That’s hilarious! I’m glad that’s never happened to me. But I’m always worried about getting on the wrong train, even stone-cold sober.

  6. Bonestorm says:

    A similar thing happened on a bus I was on recently when a woman passenger found she had missed her stop and decided to blame the bus driver. That was an interesting conversation…

  7. marycub says:

    I’m usually not too bad when i’ve had a few, my main no-no are phones. I end up dialing up/texting ex boyfriends which is really embarrassing in the morning – and probably fairly annoying for the targeted exes. Oh well, a bit of dignity bashing is the law once alcohol is consumed!

  8. Invader_Stu says:

    ChickyBabe – I had to buy some food so I could sneak downstairs and secretly sleep. Not my best idea ever.

    BlondebutBright – I don’t mind as long as I know I can get back.

    Bonestorm – Who won?

    marycub – I avoid phoning people when I have had a few but I have sent out emails. I’ve made no drunk posts here yet but I guess there is still time.

  9. ellen says:

    It’s nice that you linked to me, Stu, but I’m in Canada, not Europe….

  10. marycub says:

    Drunk posts are funny. Do it, do it! Also bicycles are bad when drunk too = lots of damaged cars in coventry

  11. Invader_Stu says:

    Ellen – Opps. Some how I got it into my head that you lived in Holland. I’ll fix that.

    Marycub – Don’t put ideas into my head. My mum reads this blog sometimes.

  12. DRagon lady says:

    Message for Marycub.
    Stuarts Mum reads all his blogs and has a good laugh.

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