Accident Proneness – A Visual Guide


1) Age 6 – Attempted to give myself a haircut by removing a large clump of hair from the back of my head. My mother was not impressed with my new hair style.

2) Age 7 – Received concussion after excitedly chasing a relative’s dog through the house and slamming head first into a rather (visually) hard to miss doorway.

3) Age 19 – Dyed my eye lashes black in a failed attempt to get a girls phone number (Full Story).

4) Age 15 – Chipped a tooth after accidentally running face first into another (shorter) kid during a game of tag. My tooth fragment might still be embedded in his skull somewhere.

5) Age 19 to Now – Numerous shaving accidents.

6) Age 26 – Received several bruises during a paint ball game thanks to trigger happy and colour blind team mates (Full Story).

7) Age 14 – Scar resulting from falling down a hill while gathering camp fire wood and getting cut by a passing tree branch (I don’t think it liked my attempts to burn its fallen comrades).

8) Age 3 – Almost had the tip of my thumb bit off by a donkey at a petting zoo. I still have a cool/freaky ‘dent’ in my thumb and hold no grudge against donkey-kind.

9) Age 29 – Almost cut off my own finger during a drunk attempt to make a midnight sandwich. Lacking any medical supplies in the house I had to go to the nearby police station and ask for plasters (Full Story).

10) Age 12 – Finger slammed in door.

11) Age 11 – Dog bite which stopped me going anywhere near dogs for the next three years.

12) Age 17 to 19 – Fingers super glued together on several occasions while at college (unintentionally of course, this was not the cool new thing the kids were doing back then).

13) Age 19 – Punched during a stage performance gone wrong (Full Story).

14) Age 8 – Attempted to demonstrate to my parents that I wanted to be a stunt man when I grew up by jumping off the sofa. This went well if you do not count the glass (that I had forgotten I left there while watching cartoons) I landed on which shattered into my leg.

15) Age 23 – Broken ankle from the office Christmas party (Full Story).

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(In the original cartoon I included all the injuries but that ended up looked quite horrific)

16 responses to “Accident Proneness – A Visual Guide”

  1. Tweets that mention Invading Holland » Accident Proneness – A Visual Guide -- Topsy.com says:

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  2. French Bean says:

    o_O”

    Looking at the cartoon’s happy expression, you wouldn’t think that it had undergone 15 near-death feats!

  3. French Bean says:

    Still, you have yet to explode anything in the kitchen! :-P

  4. Invader_Stu says:

    French Bean – In the original cartoon I drew myself with all the injuries and looking sad but that looked quite horrific.

  5. Invader Stu says:

    French Bean – Oh I have if you include the volcano of rice I created during my first ever attempt to cook it with out the realization that rice expands.

  6. Alison says:

    Ouch! I can commiserate with a couple of them. I ended up with bruised ribs at a concert when the singer decided to slam dance into the crowd. I’ve also exploded something in the kitchen, luckily avoiding hot sharp glass fragments impaling me.

    I think No. 9 was one of the first pieces of yours that I read. Thus, I have fond memories of that particular disaster. I’m glad you’ve lived to tell the tales!

  7. julia says:

    You might want to consider taking out a life insurance policy. Now that you’re married you need to think about these things.

  8. orangesplaash says:

    That is a tad too many. Wishing you all the best! I suffered from a dog bite when I was around 10 and that has prevented me from going anywhere near them even now.

  9. Invader Stu says:

    Alison – It sounds like you have around about as much luck as me then. I think we are both lucky that the Flight of the Concords concert was more tame :p

    Julia – I don’t know. It might make it too tempting for my wife to arrange an ‘accident’ :p

    Orangesplaash – I know how you feel. I can’t remember when I started being ok around dogs again but I did slowly over time.

  10. Anita says:

    I remember # 3 # 9 and # 15, hahaha ! Wait until you have your own kids. Then you will really have material for maaaany posts !

  11. Just a Plane Ride Away says:

    Um, am I the only one who wants to see the original cartoon?

  12. dragonlady says:

    You forgot age 4 when Lloyd shut your thumb in his street door and took the top nearly off.Also age 12 months when you fell while learning to walk and put your tooth through your lip. Even at a very young age you were well known at the local childrens hospital. Maybe thats why they pulled it down.

  13. French Bean says:

    @Dragonlady: Sorry, but I had to laugh…

  14. Heather says:

    I am seeing a sequel written all by Dragonlady! :)

  15. Jules says:

    I also second the sequel by Dragonlady!

  16. Invader Stu says:

    Anita – Oh I am very aware of that :) It makes me hope they take more after their mother :p

    JaPRA – I don’t think you are. I might have to finish it.

    Dragonlady – I’m not surprised their are some I have forgotten. IT’s hard to keep track of them all.

    FB, Heather & Jules – I think my mum might have to do a guest post some day.

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