Monthly Archives: November 2006

Cooking Disasters

I lived with my parents until I moved to Holland. This made moving out a double shock. Not only was I going out into the world by myself for the first time but I was also doing it in a completely different country. I had to learn to cook for myself (or choose from less appealing options such as McDonalds or starving) but at the time I could hardly even boil an egg. My early […]

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Me: “Have you got any plans for the 19th? Your Dad is trying to arrange something.” Me: “No, nothing at the moment. Why? What is he organizing?” Mum: “I’m sworn to secrecy but we’re going to book tickets and it should give you another funny story for your blog.” Me: “Considering that most of my funny blog entries involve me getting trapped in lifts, breaking bones or some other kind of physical injury, should I […]

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Undercover Englishman

After five years of living in Holland I have come to a conclusion that has not been easy to accept. I have been trying to ignore this revelation for some time but I must finally accept it. I would be a terrible spy. The child in me has taken this as a heavy blow. During my day to day life in Holland I regularly find myself in situations that would result in my cover being […]

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Quote of the Week: Nieuw Nieuw Straat

English co-worker: “The bar is on new new street? There is actually a street called new new street? Cool.” American co-worker: (Commenting to Dutch co-worker) “New New Street? Floris your people are dumb.” English co-worker: “And that’s coming from an American.”

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Train Ticket Criminal

I am a criminal. I have broken the rules of our society and paid the price. People will judge me for the rest of my life. As I walk down the street I already feel their disapproving eyes on me and I hear their hushed whispers to each other. “Look… there goes the guy who forgot to buy a new train ticket.” My crime is forgetfulness. Anyone who travels on the train with a monthly […]

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